Three weeks ago, we had a bout of forgetfulness in our household.
The first major slip-up came in our mistaking the time for one of our son’s year-end concerts. The family had been planning to attend this event for months, and greatly looked forward to it.
For some unreasonable reason, we all thought the event started at 8 p.m. I dropped Tyler off at 6:50 for his warm-up, drove off to run a few errands and came back at 7:45 only to catch the last applause of the evening. My wife and friend had just arrived minutes earlier. It had started at 7 p.m. We were all greatly disappointed. At least Tyler made it on time to participate!
It was a major error in understanding all the way around, and my wife and I were distressed about how we could make such a big mistake.
Two days later, a similar episode happened again. Then late Sunday night a couple of days after that, I realized my wife and I had just missed an Improv comedy event I had bought special tickets for.
I couldn’t believe it!
The Improv lapse was totally my fault and I took full blame, but I was stunned how the time had totally slipped my mind. I rarely forget!! If anyone in the family remembers, it’s me. And I completely failed in this case.
With three serious lapses in 5 days, I couldn’t help but see a larger spiritual lesson to be learned. This bout of forgetfulness was abnormal and unacceptable. I decided some major prayer action was needed to prevent further forgetfulness in the future.
As I listened to God for answers, I concluded that my lapse in memory was the effect of being overly impressed by everyone else’s lapse in memory the previous few days.
The timing for the other events, I had relied upon others to keep me informed and felt letdown when the information was obviously wrong. Nonetheless, I had not sufficiently seen the unreality of the error, had become too impressed by it, and then lived it out myself Sunday night.
I vaguely remembered a proverb that I think goes, “What thou see’est, thou be’est.” Maybe I made this quote up, but I believe someone famous, like Shakespeare, said as such. If not, it worked for me anyway….
I’ve seen this phenomenon of people judging others as being in error and then manifesting the same error in their own lives played out in the experience of many people in the past, including myself. The very problem we blame others for, we manifest ourselves.
And that’s what happened to me that week. I saw others as forgetful, and before I knew it, I was living out forgetfulness too. This was not cool!
In humility, I reprimanded my error of condemning (not too harshly!) the rest of my family for being forgetful earlier on, and vowed to know the spiritual truth about everyone’s perfect spiritual memory.
I affirmed that there is one Mind, and that the one Mind never forgets. That each member of my family expressed the one divine intelligence completely and entirely, which meant they did not have the capacity to forget. And I didn’t either! Divine Mind remembers every detail, and there is no lapse in recollection.
I found my peace with this truth, and put all the poor memories behind me.
I’m happy to report that there has been no more forgetfulness on anyone’s part. Hooray!
The lesson was major, though. This rule of not judging others erroneously was brought home with a hard landing. I had judged the others as being forgetful, and then, unwittingly, I manifested the same error.
We learn in Christian Science, that what we hold in our thinking to be true about our neighbor, we’re liable to believe about ourselves. So it’s very important to not hold error in our thought about others if we wish to stay free of it!
The apostle Paul wrote,
“You are inexcusable, O man, whoever you are who judge, for in whatever you judge another you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things.” Romans 2:1
Lesson learned. If you judge another, be sure it’s a healthy spiritually correct judgment! See what God put there to begin with, and you’ll be standing on safe mental ground.
Evan,
Wonderful article! I find this so, so true. Lately as I pray to treat specific issues (often judgements), I am discovering that the exact problem that I am worried or concerned about related to another person’s behavior – I soon detect an area in my own experience that I am exhibiting the exact same behavior. So, “What thou see’est, thou be’est”. Although I am grateful for the revelation as it gives me direction for my prayers and then resolution, I am extremely humbled and often very surprised to discover these undesirable, undetected traits in myself. Because I am doing this every day it has be quite an “eye opener” for me and I am put into my place regularly. I was laughing so hard when I read your article because I am truly laughing “with you” and not “at you”.
Thank you!
Hi Evan,
Sorry to hear forgetfulness had its way with you for a few days. However the insightful message you received and shared seems to be fitting right in with the working out of a scripture that talks about giving and receiving: “For the measure you give will be the measure you get back.”
You happened to put a twist on the verse (actually the verse wasn’t mentioned, but I see a connection) that may not be so obvious to everyone. Your viewing of the reality of forgetfulness expressing itself in some others unintentionally led to the acceptance of this forgetfulness trait manifesting itself in you. What a bummer, since you were just observing so-called “reality.”
It can be difficult – even with practice – to see right through mortal mind’s deficiencies, and to visualize the Christ as always shining through in the invisible, but “This is the light that lightest every man who comes into the world,” and Christ is eternally there awaiting recognition … in man’s various avenues of personal expression.
I heard a Wednesday evening testimony several years back. In her testimony this young mother told how she had begun to come down with a persistent cough. Then she thought back and recalled recognizing, and not mentally challenging, the cough a neighbor was having trouble with. She took in this insight as a lesson to be learned, she shared with us, changed her thinking regarding her neighbors cough, and quickly recovered her own normal well-being. It was a good testimony for my ears to take in and begin reflecting on its practicality in my own life.
I know we are not to get anxious about maybe “forgetting” to see only the ideal in our surroundings – as this could become a problem in itself. However when something in particular is called to our attention as not belonging where it appears to have landed – like in a friend – then it is “loving your neighbor” to silently and gently speak to the problem: “Be gone, you don’t belong there!”
This is an interesting topic, I think. Glad you brought it up.
You are welcome. And thanks for your insights!
Hi Evan,
First, I want to thank you in general for your willingness to blog for us your day-to-day trials that lead to helpful revelations. This blog article hits home for us all, I’m sure! It reminds me of a Sentinel radio program some years back that dealt with bearing false witness against our neighbor. In essence, anytime we accept a lie about others we are bearing false witness, and breaking a commandment. Ouch! Don’t want to do that! Often I hear my friends (and myself) voicing untrue thoughts about the condition of man. While the 5 senses seem to confirm those observations, we know they lie about God’s children, who reflect God’s goodness and perfection always. Gosh, thanks for this always timely reminder to be an alert and truthful witness.
Pam C.
I think I should have said at the end of my first comment above, “Be gone, you don’t belong there,” to MY mental image of this friend with a seeming problem. I say this because I wouldn’t want to “mentally trespass” upon the person’s OWN image of themself, without permission.
I perceive there is a difference in attitude here. Maybe not. But I didn’t think of including this point till later on after I had already submitted the comment– so it didn’t get in there.
I’ll pray knowing Divine Understanding is always translating accurately, with love, the meaning I mean to speak or write, or what I hear others communicate.