What a woman wants

April 29, 2010 | 6 comments

“What does a woman want anyway? It’s a common question that frequently surfaces in my work from men young and old who are striving to work out relationship issues with their girlfriend or spouse.

Well, I certainly don’t have all the answers, but I’ve learned a thing or two in over 23 years of successful marriage.

It’s really fairly simple, guys. A woman wants love!

A woman wants to feel cherished, valued and respected.

A woman with pure motives doesn’t have her eye on your money, your things, your fondling or your favorite appendage. A woman wants to feel supported, listened to, honored, comforted, and understood.

Love is patient. Love is kind. Love is gentle. Love is generous, forthcoming, caring and openly sharing, enjoyable to be around, pleasant to keep company with, a joy to associate with.

Love is not hidden, hard to find, temporarily surfacing to get what it wants and then going into retreat.

Love is reliable, predictable, certain and dependable. It doesn’t fly into a rage or throw a fit when it doesn’t get what it wants. It doesn’t cry and complain pouring out feel sorry-for-myself stories, and it doesn’t hide grudges under the surface.

Love is generous, unselfish, and a delight to be around.

Women want to be loved. It’s not hard at all, really.

To succeed in relationships, it’s super important to be honest about how you are viewing, thinking about and treating the woman of your affection.

Do you truly love her? Or are you using her? Ouch. I know this hurts. But it’s important to admit.

Are you truly honoring her individuality, seeing her as an equal?

Do you honestly value her opinion and thoughtfully consider her ideas, or do you do your best to put up with them and quickly move onto another subject?

Are you sensitive to the messages she is sending you, or are you so fixed on what you want that you ignore important signals?

Do you listen to what she has to say?

Are you willing to give when she asks for it? Or do you give only on your own terms?

Are you willing to slow down when she asks you to be patient?

A healthy happy relationship is love in action. Enduring relationships are built on divine Love, the source of all possibilities in love to begin with.

So, if you’re having trouble with your lady, cease pointing the finger of blame, make an honest self-assessment about your own behavior and attitude, and see if there is room for improvement.

I know, I know, there are always two sides to every story. But the first place to make the correction is always in your own thought.

You get what you give, for the most part. When you genuinely give from the bottom of your heart to the woman who cares for you too, and with no conditions attached, love will come flowing right back to you. One heart speaks to another.

A woman’s needs and wants are quite simple really. They are the same ones you have. And it’s all summed up in one short phrase, to feel loved.

Focus on the love part more, and the other issues will resolve much easier.

6 thoughts on “What a woman wants”

  1. Thank you so much! This is clear, easy to understand, accurate… Also fun to read. 🙂 I love the quote from Eccl. (it *is* Eccl, right?) “Love suffereth long and is kind…”

    I’m going to forward this link to all the women who send me e-mail forwards… Some of the forwards they send me… are… not quite as positively written. Though they are usually pretty funny.

    Thank you again for this wonderful, practical, fun post.

  2. You’ve made me cry as I’m feeling so lonely and unloved but thank you so much.
    I’ll retrace my focus to the very source of true love that is Divine love.

  3. You’ve made me cry as I’m feeling so lonely and unloved but thank you so much.
    I’ll retrace my focus to the very source of true love that is Divine love.

  4. High five Evan. Thank goodness my husband understands that for the most part. All men and women need to read this and practice it.

Leave a comment!

Keep the conversation going! Your email address will not be published.