Would you agree that other people are much more enjoyable to be around and work with when they see the good qualities you express, appreciate your strengths and express gratitude for the good work that you do? I’m guessing you do. Most people warm up to positive reinforcement.
But we have to remember that the converse rule applies as well. We are much more enjoyable to be around when we see the good qualities in others, point out their strengths and express gratitude for their positive contributions!
And this means no put downs.
Put downs come so subtly at times. They often look innocent on the surface, but are evil throughout and even malicious at times.
Put downs, like, “You always mess up. You won’t get it right. You are incompetent, untrustworthy, unreliable,” and more, can be highly demoralizing for the person who hears them over and over again in overt or backhanded kind of ways. Perhaps they appear justified because there was a mess up in the past, but they do nothing to help a person do better in the future.
The cure for put downs is love.
True love sees the good in another, even if faintly apparent. True love extends a helping hand. True love works to bring the best out of another person. True love is forgiving, infinitely patient, and supportive. Love does not put down but builds up. True love makes life easier for another person, not more difficult. True love brings to bear a healing influence.
See the good in everyone and honor its presence with your recognition of it. Avoid the put downs and make life more enjoyable for everyone.