I’ve been giving thought to the value and benefit of faithfulness to a healthy happy marriage over the past few weeks.

My wife and I watch a number of movies over time, and many of them script out the trials, tribulations, joys, fears, wants, blessings and woes of men and women looking for love, trying to preserve love or running away from it.

Love seems to be such a hard thing for many people to figure out. It’s an odd twist of mortal mind to make love so complicated at times. It’s not complicated at all, really. Jesus Christ showed us how to do it. It’s all written out in the Sermon on the Mount. But the fact that so many people struggle with how to love means the topic needs to be taken up with compassion and thoughtfulness, and a humble recognition that there is much to learn about it.
And without doubt, one of the qualities that make love work is faithfulness.

When I say faithfulness, though, I’m not talking only about sexual activity. I know many marriages that have had a spouse go astray sexually, but the two work it out, stay together and flourish.

Faithfulness is much more than a physical commitment. It’s a spiritual commitment!

Faithfulness is seeing the child of God in the other and living true to one’s own spiritual individuality. It means thinking true to what God knows to be true about the other and living out what is spiritually true for one’s self.

For instance, if your spouse gets angry, the temptation might be to get angry too, or mad at them for getting angry. But faithfulness goes higher. Faithfulness recognizes the presence of love in the home and knows love always triumphs over anger. Love is patient, calm, composed. Love rides through the storm until the waves die down and the sun appears again. Faithfulness knows enough about the goodness in the other person that it doesn’t get swept away by temporary negative emotion.

Faithfulness in marriage is a spiritual commitment between two people to see the best in each other, to honor the good, to not believe in the evil but to overcome it. Faithfulness is not selfish, self-serving or self-righteous. Faithfulness cares, gives, and extends the helping hand, the warm embrace, the comforting hug. Faithfulness is dependable, reliable, and certain. Faithfulness stands when all else fails.

When I look at marriages that prosper and last for decades, faithfulness is always a present quality in the relationship. Two people have learned, no doubt through trial and error, that honoring the good in one another without fail leads to great reward over the long run.

I am very grateful when my wife recognizes the good in me, even when I am not living up to my potential. It humbles me and reminds me of who I am in God’s image and what I’m capable of being and doing. And likewise, I strive to do the same for her.

Seeing the good in one another is all part of being faithful—seeing what God sees and bringing it out for the benefit of the whole relationship.

When we live faithful to God—to God’s image—we’ll live faithful to our spouse. And both are blessed.