Don’t respond to the stupidity of a fool; you’ll only look foolish yourself.
~ Proverbs 26:4, The Message
Be wise about how you respond
November 18, 2025 | 22 comments
Spiritual ideas that inspire healing
November 18, 2025 | 22 comments
Don’t respond to the stupidity of a fool; you’ll only look foolish yourself.
~ Proverbs 26:4, The Message
Amen!
Been there, done it, don’t want to do it again, lessons learned for sure, but sooo grateful I am learning the lessons of humility that blesses ALL!
Thank you SV and especially dear Evan.
…and haven’t we all done that! Great reminder to be alert! Thank you.
Thank you again, Evan, for all the SpiritViews. This admonition about not responding to a fool is very profound. It’s a reminder not to respond to mortal mind in any of its suggestions. They’re all foolish and will eventually dissipate in the light of Truth. Nothing beats the admonition to “Stand porter at the door of thought,” as Mrs. Eddy reminds us.
Indeed! Thank you, Bob, and thank you, Evan.
I am trying to work out how the picture relates to this
topic, which is a very good one.
We all need to be alert to this suggestion.. If we are seeing a fool, we are seeing ourselves, so we need to be always watchful of our thoughts and keeping them filled with love for our fellow man, and looking for the true image of God in everyone.
Thank you, Evan. I appreciate the reminder, and I love that translation. And thank you, Maggie, for your comment: “if we are seeing a fool…”
Thanks Maggie. Regarding the picture: maybe she just encountered a “fool” and is just walking away from the foolishness. But I do agree with your thinking that God never created a fool, so we can remember to separate so-called human behavior from the child that God created. The only fool is error, mortal mind, material sense, because it does not and cannot understand the majesty and all goodness of God so it’s always saying erroneous foolish things.
Thankyou Evan, I’m learning this lesson quite often. not to listen to mortal minds foolish suggestions. turning from the lie to ever Present Truth. Jesus said, What I Say Unto You I Say Unto All ” WATCH,” Thankyou all for your Uplifting Thoughts. Love to all.
Thank you Evan for the most evocative photo and for the warnings of Proverbs 26. How does one apply them as a CS? How does one see man as God’s image, yet verses 24-26 warn of people with bad characters who “greet you like a friend while plotting against you and just waiting to rip you off…liars whose hatred is covered by deceit”? I was deceived and victimized by such and was vulnerable since CS parents told me they were good. And now these verses rang a loud bell of caution about a friend.
Yes, I think it’s sad that Christianity in general, not just CS, has promoted the idea that we have to “forgive” people that treat us badly and then act as if it never happened. The first definition of “forgive” in Webster’s 1828 dictionary reads:
To pardon; to remit, as an offense or debt; to overlook an offense, and treat the offender as not guilty.
I found a series of podcasts on the Sermon on the Mount on the Bible Project website and during one podcast they discussed how through the centuries, people have stayed in abusive situations because of how forgiveness is portrayed in that Sermon. But in Matthew 18: 15-17 the “condition” for being able to treat someone again as if they are “not guilty” is very clearly described:
15 “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.
16 But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’
17 If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.
This is referenced in the Manual of the Mother Church:
Violation of By-Laws. Sect. 2. A member who is found violating any of the By-Laws or Rules herein set forth, shall be admonished in consonance with the Scriptural demand in Matthew 18:15–17; and if he neglect to accept such admonition, he shall be placed on probation, or if he repeat the offense, his name shall be dropped from the roll of Church membership.
(Manual of The Mother Church, Mary Baker Eddy, p. 50:22)
So I have to conclude Mrs. Eddy gave importance to Matthew 18:15-17 in her own experience expected us to use this Matthew 18 code in our personal lives too.
If I were to write a manual for how to clear a string wrapped around a lawn mower blade I would NOT just write “Reach under the mower and grab the string and unwind it.” I’d instead write “Stop the mower, remove the cable to the spark plug to ensure the mower won’t start, then reach under the mower and grab the string and unwind it.” I feel like some of the references to forgiveness in the New Testament leave out the “conditions” for forgiving someone and just jump to the forgiveness part (i.e., leave out the “stop the mower” part). Maybe the conditions for forgiveness were so well known by the Gospel authors they didn’t think they needed to explicitly state those conditions every time they mentioned the importance of forgiveness. But I also don’t believe we should hold on to resentment and if someone that treated us badly is no longer in our orbit, we can forgive them and know they are in reality God’s child and free our thinking from the memory of the bad behavior.
Thank you Robert for your thoughtful response. How does one treat a pagan who still keeps trying to be in your orbit whom others have warned you of harm she did to them and when she has tried to hurt you? I ended the friendship last year since we are on very different paths but saw her again out of love and compassion and old habit when she called about 10 months later but think I opened up to what Proverbs 26 cautions against.
Each situation is different so I encourage you to know that God has an answer for what you should do. I know if you listen, God will guide you as to what to do. It sounds like you made it clear to this person that they hurt you. Did they apologize? Did you feel that they had sincerely repented? If not, then it probably wasn’t wise to agree to see her again. If you now feel having this person in your life isn’t good for you, you can again politely explain that you don’t feel having a relationship with this person is healthy for you and stop seeing her until you feel she has changed. Sometimes the other person won’t change unless they see a reason to do so and breaking off a relationship with them may be the impetus they need to sincerely change if they truly love you and value your friendship.
She never apologized nor repented and I did not confront her since I felt she wanted to hurt me because she was angry she couldn’t use me as she used to … ie. because of Covid I did not invite her for Thanksgiving, did not celebrate it. It was a habit over many years of nice/nasty behavior which I never confronted since I could never confront my stepmother who did the same.
I ended the friendship because she is into all the dark alternative news and I am onto the spiritual path for many years. We have gone in very different directions. And letting her back in my life, since she needed support I gave, just sent me down a dark path. She has not called for 2 months as if she accomplished her missions. And I finally last week asked her to stop sending links to dark news.
Robert, I forgot to thank you for this good thought:
*I also don’t believe we should hold on to resentment and if someone that treated us badly is no longer in our orbit, we can forgive them and know they are in reality God’s child and free our thinking from the memory of the bad behavior.”
Very helpful and hard to forget – a work in progress.
As for the Matthew code, if you don’t have others to take with you across the country, and if they are rich and famous and a major donor to their church, it doesn’t work.
The Matthew code was written in a time and environment that is very different from where we are at today. Therefore, I think we have to take the “spirit” of the code and not limit ourselves to the “letter”. For example, a family a few houses down from mine has a large dog that they walk through our neighborhood. In the past, if they saw us in our yard, they would bring the dog (on a leash) into our yard and chat with us. We have a cat and one day the dog went after our cat. The dog was on a leash so it didn’t harm our cat, but we decided it would be best if they not bring the dog into our yard and we asked them not to do that anymore. That was about a year ago. About 2 months ago the father of this family brought the dog into our yard, walked it up on our porch, and rang our doorbell. I went to the door and as politely as possible given how upset I was explained bringing the dog in our yard was NOT acceptable and reminding him we had asked him not to do that. If he had apologized, that would have been the end of it. But instead he didn’t apologize and walked off in a huff. In regard to the Matthew code, I felt I completed step 1. I confronted this person over not honoring our request and he did not express any remorse over his actions or apologize. I couldn’t think of two or more people I could take with me to confront him to fulfill step 2 of this code and we don’t go to the same church, so I didn’t see how I could do step 3 of the Matthew code either. I decided I had fulfilled the code as best as I could and therefore it was appropriate to treat him like a “pagan or tax collector” which to me means I shouldn’t have no contact with him anymore. So that’s what I decided to do. But for days this experience kept repeating itself in my thought and I re-experienced the hurt and anger I felt over it. Finally I just thought “God, I’m releasing this situation to you…I know you will guide me as to what to do at the right time” and that gave me some peace. I also knew that this man was in truth God’s manifestation and eventually that truth would be revealed humanly. We typically go to this family’s house for Thanksgiving and when this man’s wife invited us (via text) a couple of days ago I constructed a response with my wife’s help politely explaining we decline their invitation because of what happened and because the man showed no remorse. That has now caused this man’s wife and daughter to confront him about his actions. So I feel God provided this way of continuing the Matthew code by the fact that now two other people have confronted this man and let him know what he did was not appropriate. My wife and I met with his wife and daughter last night and they told us he’s remorseful and he won’t ever come into our yard again with their dog. I thanked them but made it clear I need to hear him apologize and determine if it’s sincere before I felt I could restore my friendship with him. So it will be interesting to see what happens next. When the wife and daughter seemed stressed over how they could resolve this situation, I just told them that I knew the situation would be resolved at some point and that they shouldn’t feel they need to pressure him. I always love getting my pre-conceived ideas as to how something will get resolved out of the way and let God reveal the perfect solution. I know you too can let God reveal the perfect solution for your situation too!
Thank you for sharing your experience Robert. It is good you and your wife could meet with his wife & daughter. It occurs to me that your neighbor just forgot about not bringing the dog into your yard or didn’t think it was a problem since it was on a leash and he had something he needed to tell you. So you could thank him for being so considerate for the past two years and trust that he understands that your need to protect your dear cat continues.
I have to be careful to have compassion and not self-righteousness, “the adamant of error” MBE wrote, which I sometimes have when I am standing for righteousness. Sometimes the ego gets in the way of love. It’s rather tricky. I trust love and forgiveness will resolve the situation. As MBE said, “If you want to heal, just love, love, love”. However wisdom & discernment tells me to not invite my old pagan friend to my home for Thanksgiving.
Wishing you a Happy Thanksgiving full of love.
PS. Robert,
Two men in my CS church who were friends and supportive of each other got in a dispute (based on their male egos I thought) which ended their good friendship. I trust you will not let this happen to you & your neighbor/friend. A little humility goes a long way sometimes….. Also, see Evan’s Nov 17 SpiritView.
Hi LOL. Jesus also taught, “Be wise as serpents.” Jesus was not naive about the evil intent in enemies around him. He read their minds. He could see right through them. And we are to be as wise.
To forigve does not mean we overlook evil. It means that we don’t let someone else’s evil become evil in our thought. It means retaining poise and dominion, and reflecting a Mind of Love that enables one to respond intelligently and adeptly to whatever is coming at them. It does not mean letting others abuse us. It means keeping a clear thought of Truth and Love that enables one to act and think in ways that protect one from abuse. It’s wisdom in action. It’s about keeping all evil out of OUR thought. Why? Because when we let evil take over our thought, we make poor decisions, blind decisions. We are not thinking clearly. We never ignore evil. We face it fearlessly, and stay so clear on the omnipotence of God, that we can prove it powerless to harm us. Hope that helps.
Thank you Evan. Coincidentally the thought “Wiser than serpents” came to mind earlier this afternoon. There is a fine old pamphlet of that name. I was so conditioned to be naive and to see no evil and told “evil is unreal” by my CS mother quoting MBE and to see evil doers as good. She was trying to live in the Absolute as her CS teacher taught her. So I was not wise to serpents for decades. And then in uncovering evil, it entered into my thought. And in standing up to evil in my family, I was rejected, not supported nor loved.
And since I was trained to see everyone as good and not see the evil intent in family and those whom I thought were friends I could trust who deceived me, now it is hard to believe that I have been victimized by that old friend. But she opened my thought to evil, to the darkling past, and then some bad things happened to me since I last saw her a few months ago. And those verses in the Proverbs 26 just screamed at me last night with her name on them, so it has become evil in my thought. Jesus cast out evil spirits. He did not say there is no evil. I don’t know how to do that, only to avoid her again, to stay safe from that darkness that came at me through her.
PS. The darkness is powers, principalities and wickedness in high places which I experienced and she wants to expose..
Thank you Evan, for clarifying the need to protect one’s thought when …”being influenced or …influencing erroneously.” My inability to sometimes see through the expressed lie with compassion or love prevents me from loving myself and others. I have learned in studying Christian Science that starting with one’s true identity, as the child of Love (the idea of Mind) is the first step to loving. I have often ignored error in myself and others thinking that walking away is the best for all. However, I now realize that acknowledging a hurt feeling and then turning to God/Mind for how to respond is the way to work it through. Don’t do it all the time or perfectly just would like to put it into action. Thanks
I think mm (mortal mind) tends to have us believe that someone is against
us (like the serpent in Genesis) and our misinterpretation tries to see this
erroneous belief as a personal flaw … but in Reality, we are all children
of God’s being, despite what it may Seem to be. To me, the photo above
is like trying to stay on the path of Love, despite what may appear to a storm
(rain) around us. Ahead is bright and we are protected by the umbrella of
Love’s comfort along the way … shielding us from whatever would attempt
to take away our peace and happiness.