Do you ever feel obliged to resent another’s actions?
Perhaps a family member says something cruel that hurts. Maybe someone at the office takes an action that has adverse consequences on your work, or a neighbor has taken advantage of your generosity and care? Whatever the instance, there is no obligation to resent in return. You can love instead. It’s a choice you can make!
It’s always far better to love than to hate.
Love doesn’t overlook evil, pretend like it never happened, or ignore it. Love wipes it out! Love is what reforms thought for the better, improves circumstances and benefits everyone involved.
When you side with Love, you side with God, and God always has the final say.
Jesus Christ said, “If someone takes unfair advantage of you, use the occasion to practice the servant life. No more tit-for-tat stuff. Live generously. You’re familiar with the old written law, ‘Love your friend,’ and its unwritten companion, ‘Hate your enemy.’ I’m challenging that. I’m telling you to love your enemies. Let them bring out the best in you, not the worst. When someone gives you a hard time, respond with the energies of prayer, for then you are working out of your true selves, your God-created selves. This is what God does. He gives his best—the sun to warm and the rain to nourish—to everyone, regardless: the good and bad, the nice and nasty”
(Matt. 5:41-45, The Message).
When another person seems to give you their worst, give them your best. Pour on the love and take control of the situation.
There is no obligation to resent. You don’t need to waste energies on a fruitless activity. Choose to love instead. Master the situation, and demonstrate dominion over it.
Fantastic! We always have that choice and I think it’s something we forget. And sometimes,it’s a revelation!
Thank you, Evan! I am so grateful to be reminded of this fact again today. I was so tempted to resent someones action yesterday feeling so justified!
All day I had diligently been working to be alert to reverse any suggestion of evil in my thoughts! So I was alert to see the negative feelings that crept in suddenly, so strongly, so aggressively and I saw resentment clearly as an imposition. I deleted them in my thoughts and replaced them with loving thoughts instead. Love annihilated the hateful, resentful thoughts completely! This also gave me the freedom to have a harmonious rest of the day unfettered by dark thinking but filled with joyful, expectantcy of good.
It was a gift I gave myself through staying tuned in to God! I am so grateful!
“The harmony of our being can never be reached while we cherish a single discord…”
The Mary Baker Eddy Collection
Christine, I appreciated your idea that choosing loving thoughts was a gift you gave yourself through staying tuned in to God. I love that we can choose to give ourself this gift and it’s always available, all loving thoughts are contained in divine Mind in unlimited quantities, just waiting for us to turn toward them.
We are presented with many opportunities to grow every day in this spiritual university called life. Sometimes it’s very challenging to choose the higher way, esp. if we feel hurt, but if we remember to lean on God and ask Him to lead us, the way will be much smoother. Thank you to Evan for wonderful guidance and to all dear SpiritView friends.
Rose, I love thinking of life as a “spiritual university.” So often your thoughts provide an example of Evan’s great blog. Thank you and Evan and all for your input.
Thank you very much Pat for your kind comments. Sending love your way!
Thank you so much, Evan, for this wonderful inspiration. So helpful when it seems one has been wronged by someone. That quote from “The Message” is just brilliant.
Love wipes out the evil – such a helpful reminder that love is the answer. Love gives us dominion.
Thank you, Evan.
Makes so much more sense to love, you feel better and only does good for the other individual, whether they’re wrong or right. Something that came to me after a bad breakup….
..It’s never too late, love is stronger than hate…
Love this idea of resentment being a waste of time. Its put on us to carry this thought process through by a masquerader, hiding itself as a justified thought/reaction, when it is really the other side of the same coin of the one who committed the first wrong. The person seeming to receive the wrongdoing, who puts love out there, and takes control of the situation as a consequence is a also a great proactive response. Much food for thought in a revelatory way Evan, thanks much!!!
-Jordan K.
I had purchased a rather expensive special surprise gift certificate for a friend at a nursery I thought
she would enjoy. Before giving it, she had said she wouldn’t be going there any more
because things were not growing that well because of the weather. That seemed like such a letdown for me and it was really starting to ruin my day and I felt so badly, as I thought this would be the perfect gift for her. Then I realized that I was Letting it ruin my day. My change of thought, changed the direction my day was going and I steered back in the right direction. These little devious thoughts that try to creep into our thinking have to be dealt with and Love is always the best antidote. I Re Sent those resentment thoughts of disappointment packing and realized there are a lot of other things at the nursery that could still make her happy with the gift and my whole attitude changed and so did my day.
Our leader says, “the kingdom of heaven is within you. Know then, you have sovereign power to think and act rightly and nothing can dispossess us of this heritage or trespass on Love.” We always have dominion because we always have the ability to make the right choice. We can always choose what we do or don’t do, whether or what and how we say something, how we feel… because we can always choose what we think. There was a saying that became a song by Theodore Bikel during the Nazi occupations of Europe, “Thoughts are free. You can’t put them in jail.” And the ultimate choice is between life or death, between love or fear. So I help myself by saying over and over, “I choose love. No matter what.“ When I feel tempted or see others or I think they are tempted to go into denial, argue, passively submit, camouflage and fake, run away, distract themselves with addictions or whatever, be violent or destructive, act super charming appeasing and pleasing, shut down, tune out, align with the bullies, get stubborn and self justifying, or have narrow rigid black-and-white thinking, or act overwhelmed, then I know those are just Mind-less reactions of fear. Those are the same reactions that animals and plants and other organisms have in a repertoire of fear reactions. But we can do better. Justice some animals and even trees choose when under attack or threatened or endangered or hurt, to be curious and to courageously support the others of the pack or herd or even other species of trees in their environment, we can choose to not act out of fear in self-destructive ways, but instead, We can choose to be calmly alert and curious to learn and we can choose to courageously “befriend and attend.” Like the Iraqis under US helicopter fire chose to run out and help the people who were targeted at the risk of their own lives. I can choose to remember the part of the “Therefore…” prayer that God gave me. I can choose to trust, “God is enabling me to know God is omnipotent, supreme, Therefore, here and now each and every detail of each and every person, and each and every situation, and even each and every sensation, is exactly precisely perfect for my individualized instruction with the lessons and blessings I need here now for my growth and grace— self knowledge, humility, love, and kind deeds— healing liberty and justice for all.” Therefore I choose love. And I know that each human being has the ability to act at least as morally and ethically as a tree that generously and graciously even at self-sacrifice helps the other trees and organisms and it’s environment. Everyone, no matter what, can choose love, and be blessed by that.
Well shared, Edith Gillis, Your comments give my heart hope, when my daughter informed her dad and me yesterday that she thinks she needs mental health counseling. My thought towards her decision has room to change, with your helpful piece today, there’s plenty of room for that change of heart, with or without mental health counseling. I’m going with the tuning out, shutting out any dark thoughts of my own, as she seeks answers for herself as well. THANK YOU for the contribution. It’s helping alot. I can present her a copy of your contribution, knowing it will guide her, as she grows in her self-liberating understanding of who she is and who created her, IN HIS IMAGE and LIKENESS.
Beautiful Evan, Thank you ♡ … reminders are more than necessary at times.
I remain, grateful 🙂
MBE said….”the heart and soul of Christian Science is Love.” Enough said!
Thank you Evan. Very thought-provoking and just what I needed to read. I really love that we have a choice, and can ditch a knee-jerk reaction of being resentful, hurt, judgmental, self-righteous (that feels so burdensome ) and can side with God instead.
Sometimes we forget that pouring love on a troublesome situation is like pouring water on a fire, quenching it. Getting angry or being resentful is like pouring gasoline on the fire and making it worse. Love is always better!
This is the mature approach to living and much preferred to the immature attitude of getting even. Thank you for spelling it out.
‘Taking the liberating step beyond forgiveness’:
https://journal.christianscience.com/shared/view/1pmnzcabxv2?s=e
Thank you Evan, this is an ongoing problem with families I think. We can re send messages of love rather than resentment. I am always inspired by your kind words.
Regrettably I am resentful to my neighbor’s action which seems very disturbing for the whole neighborhood. She has the garden door open and phones and talks very loud, and that almost unimterupted. Yes I prayed to love her and be friendly. And after praying the Lords Prayer I became calm knowing she is God’s child too.
Thank you Evan for the comforting and healing truth, that God always has the final say! And thanks so very much for this SpiritView giving lovingly just what I need !!!
Love the joyful foto!
Thanks to Angie for the article and to all for the helpful comments!♡
When Science and Health advises to “pour in Truth through floodtides of Love,” I think that means allowing Truth to overcome error in God’s way and allowing Love to wash away all recollection of the error. The combination of Truth and Love is part of the definition of Church. This combination does “extract error from mortal mind.”
Resentment is only mortal mind pretending to be my mind. It never was and never will be my mind.
Thank you Mary., I love that sentense from SH by MBEDDY “to pour in Truth with floodtides of Love.” It is very healing for me this moment, as I had again to do with resentment towards my new neighbor. I seemingly had to fight with error feeling.. However I was lead to read this comforting SpiritView from Evan which alone is already helpful. But this sentense by MBE is so good, “Truth washing away the erroneous feeling against the neighbor with floodtides of Love, God’s unerring Love. Just what you also wrote in your comment.
I am very grateful you mentioned that healing truth sentence dear Mary♡♡